hanging out with some verse|one people after practice earlier tonight was pretty fun…chilling at Giovanelli’s, buffalo chicken pizza, lateral thinking puzzles…good fun.  and it’s a SNOW DAY at Rutgers haha.

i’m writing at this early hour because i wanted to sort through some thoughts, plus i figure i can sleep a bit later b/c of snow day.  not my most attention-keeping entry.  but interesting in its own way.

So I just was on mypersonality.info and took their personality and multiple intelligences tests, and I’m not entirely sure what to make of the results (seyterin.mypersonality.info).  According to the short tests I took, I’m an ENFJ.  I’m not sure what to make of that, since I’m pretty sure it’s different than the result I had a year or so ago upon taking a fuller test.

Basically, I’m curious about certain aspects of myself.  I’m curious as to whether I’m more extroverted or introverted, and though this test tells me I’m more extroverted, I’ve usually gotten the “I” as the first letter.  In terms of what I think I am…I’m not entirely sure.  I certainly have introverted tendencies–I usually don’t mind being alone, I enjoy introspection, quiet time, solitude–but so too have I recently acquired tendencies considered more extroverted, including liking to make new friends, trying to be more confident and open with regards to starting conversations and meeting people, trying to do new and different things, etc.

I understand that the test on mypersonality.info was rather limited–actually, I felt most of the questions weren’t so easily simplified into one of two possible answers, and so I kind of think that given the limited nature of that particular questionnaire, the assessment of my personality is also kind of limited.

I was going to say that I was more sure of other aspects of my personality, but…the “mentor” label to the ENFJ is something that fits me in certain ways.  I’m actually quite curious to get opinions from people who know me well, but as I consider who I might ask, I’m feeling like few people have a complete picture of who I think I am.  I’m not sure that I really even have a complete picture of who I am.  But I mean, of the few people who I could ask, I’m not sure that any really have more insights than the next, even my closest friends, as to what makes me who I am.  Would my friends consider me more introverted or extroverted?  Would the answer depend on which group of friends (say, verse|one as compared to badminton) I asked?  I’m really not sure.

So, reader–do you know me?  Or should I ask, how well do you think you know me?  Have you read the posts I write?  Have you seen the pictures I take?  Do you understand the quotes I like?  Do you know the activities I do?  The interests I have?  What makes me happy?  What gets me mad?  If you’ve known me for a while, what do you know about me?  If I’ve only just met you, what conclusions have you already drawn?  If I’ve never met you, what assumptions have you made?

I’m assuming that most people I know don’t know, and most if not all don’t care.  And for the most part, I don’t mind, I think.  After all, most people tend to think about themselves–not a failing, necessarily, if not taken to extremes–and have plenty to worry about or focus on without bothering to learn the details of another’s life.  Indeed, who does go through a small bit of effort to learn things about their friends?  Well, that depends, doesn’t it?  Boyfriend to girlfriend?  Good friend to another?  I’m not necessarily sure of the answer myself and I don’t know that I want to think too much about it right now.

If you’ve read some posts I’ve written, what do you think?  My own take is that my writing nowadays are generally a mix of things that’ve happened, with the occasional post about something that’s on my mind.  Writing style?  Not that I’d know how to describe it, but overall, I think I write almost like I’d talk, and occasionally whimsically.  If you’ve seen some of the pictures I take, what did you think?  What does my choice of pictures say about me?  What of the quotes I like?  They draw me through a combination of an idea delivered in language that appeals to me.  Do you know what makes me happy?  Or would it tell you more about me to know what makes me mad?  I’m sure partial answers to these two questions can be answered by browsing a few entries into this blog.

I wonder if you at any point might be wondering where I’m going with this (I also wonder if you’re still reading, and if so, who you are, why, and would you like to leave a thought or two?)  I don’t think this entry is much like my usual entries–I could be wrong, since my reasoning skills aren’t top-notch at 6am–and I didn’t quite plan for it to turn out this way either.  But I think what I’m writing must intrigue me in some way, because after all of the above, I’m still writing.  I don’t think I’ll be super-satisfied with the way this post has turned out, the way I like some of my previous posts, but when I look back on this at some point in the future, I think it’ll tell me something about me right now.

I guess that’s a big part of this particular entry–me, right now.  I’m not much further along in terms of life plans than the last time I might’ve mentioned them.  I’ve done some more thinking, though I daresay not enough, because I still lack a concrete plan.

Something important to figuring myself out, I think, lies in figuring out what exactly I’m looking for in terms of people, or relationships with others in general.  I know I look to connect with people, and I haven’t actually met too many others who are receptive…haven’t found very many people who can take random opportunities to genuinely show interest in others and get to know them.

I’m curious about the kinds of people I find interesting, and why:  I’m attracted to some combination of intelligence, capability, confidence, cuteness…some turn my head but it’s usually a one-time motion unless there’s substance beneath the surface.

I’m curious about where, exactly, I’m looking to fit in.  There might be some identity confusion on my part that I’ll wonder about later.

This is one of those entries where at the end I don’t know if I’ve figured much out, or answered questions.  I suppose this is an entry that could be thought-provoking if a reader so desired.

What do you think?


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