quick look ahead

i quite think i should write something about stupid essay stuff.

there’s no point in being a partial perfectionist, or a perfectionist only some of the time, since in this case i feel like i might as well just not turn in the paper at all, it being rather…wack.

haha..something’s going to have to be done differently in the next week.

group KO

6am, friend’s apartment near Rockoff: everyone around me is KO’d, one just taking a nap and the others solidly passed out.

leaving essays to the last day is never a good idea, a fact which i’ve been reminded of these last few hours. i think some combination of caffeine and the other friend have helped keep me awake so far, but i have 5hrs left to go and i haven’t finished nearly enough. but this essay needs to be done haha.

was planning out the next week or so in terms of finals, studying, and stuff/events to be done, and it looks like i’ll be as busy as ever. this weekend–starting tonight perhaps–is probably going to be ridiculous, and i still need to get a lot of work done…another paper and presentation due Monday haha.

still things i want to write about but they’ll have to wait. back to work grrr.

nights/mornings before finals

Barely a week remains before the start of finals for the spring 2010 school year, and so much remains to be done. Now that ARC is open 24-hours during the week, I’m starting to spend more time here than in the apartment…which isn’t necessarily saying much seeing as how this semester I’ve barely been in-apt.

The past weekend–this past semester, really–has been packed, in this case starting off with trip to NYC; then Rutgers Day on Saturday with an interesting trip to the beach at night; then days/nights of studying, certain days being more productive than others.

Something has felt a bit off this last day or so. I’m not sure how much this has to do with my rather peculiar sleep schedule, but I’ve been feeling that all is not quite right. I can’t put my finger on it but the feeling is rather irritating. I feel like it might just have to do with some things here and there not adding up and me just feeling subconsciously uncomfortable…? It bears further thought I guess, since I would think at this time more than others I should feel more content than anything…you know, what with certain different things happening. Yet somehow all is not quite well, and that’s not good.

I’m hoping I can work out this disturbed feeling soon. Finals are around the corner and I need to be focused. The next few days (probably weeks until finals are over) are going to be busy, or at least, they should be, if I’m to have a hope to passing my finals. I’m determined to ace computer science, but that’s the class I’m doing best in anyway sighh.

mmm. Life’s not too shabby, even despite still being at ARC at 7am. Gotta keep pressing to improve. To quote a fortune from a fortune cookie I saw recently, “A good evening is one spent in good company.” –> quite true  =)

I don’t know what to expect in the next weeks, months. But moments wait to be lived in right now and I’d be doing myself and others a disservice if I don’t live in them as best I can. I can’t worry about past happenings or future possibilities–I need to focus on priorities, work hard, play hard, care for those important to me, and believe that life will fall into place as I go.

smile. let’s go.

a good day

Gathering at New Brunswick station. accidental F bus delay. Questions on the way to Fruity Yogurt. Rockefeller Center exploration. Searching for homeland flags. Dylan’s Candy Bar. Candy binge. Chicken & Rice on 53rd and 6th. Anticipation on line. Hugs in the wind. Times Square. Fruitless Jamba Juice/Starbucks search. Pictures of everything. Scrambling for the last train out of NYC. Pleasant napping.

no need to think of past or future, perfectly comfortable in the moments.

we do think alike sometimes hahaha.  i love these expeditions, these connections, and when things work out in unexpected ways.

4.23.10  an affectionate you. cute ^^

hello, 24hr ARC

I have a feeling that we’ll be seeing much more of ARC now that finals are close and now that the ARC computer labs are open 24hrs. For example, it’s now 6:30am and here I am tapping away (taking quick break from CS110 programming hw) on one of these nice large-screened Macs, with my friend solidly passed out on her chair on the next computer over. Dunno why I’m feeling so relatively awake at this hour…the caffeine from Starbucks, maybe, and maybe also b/c the friend’s sleeping haha.

Earlier tonight, a few of us were studying at the campus center til it closed at 1, then we migrated to ARC for a bit, then we went to Starbucks til 5ish, and then the driver dropped a few of us off, and then I came to ARC with the friend who has class here at 8:40am.

I’m pretty sure it’s going to be busy up until finals end but there are some things to look forward to: NYC trip with Verse|One this Friday, mostly to get chicken and rice haha; beach/sunrise trip this Saturday after Rutgers Day, the finer details of which still need planning; and any other random hangouts that will likely pop up.

I need to stay on top of the group project for Political Psych, and the research paper for Comparative Political Development of the Far East…need to catch up with World Politics, keep up with Western Political Thought, and just keep doing what I’ve been doing with CS110, which I’m determined to ace. Grrr we’ll see how this goes…just gotta make these next few nights more productive than not.

this closeness is something i’m not used to but in no way is that bad–it’s somehow remarkably familiar, quite comfortably satisfying, and entirely welcome.

=)

to be uploaded

this past month or so, i’ve taken so many pictures (640+ since start of April, according to Picasa) that i need to sort through and eventually upload. i managed to upload a few of the best ones earlier tonight but there’re still sooo many more haha.

it’s been a good month for pictures, i think, and hopefully it’ll stay just as good if not better…more cute things and people to take pics of 😀 haha

=) nice

what a night

minimal sleeping. mild worrying about friend. much pacing. many hours to consider.

watching the hours slip by in a semi bedside vigil. wondering. frustration/anger/resignation/disgust.

this was a different night. learning all the time, anyway.

more later.

grr. not something i've done before

eh. just don’t like being worried about ppl, even if others aren’t overly concerned and even if things end up fine. and i guess in the end things are fine.

burning the midnight oil

…or whatever you call it when you’re still up and the sun’s recently out and about.

The past few days, or week, or however long it’s been since the last entry have been pretty busy, which isn’t really much different from the past months haha.

Since last entry, I haven’t really gotten all too much done haha…the “huepa” tryouts were interesting because the people didn’t show up–verse one was at Frelinghuysen by 9pm, after I arrived I went around trying to make sure of details…ended up at the SAC enlisting the help of a reception person to look up details. Hmm.

As usual, I have a lot of things I want to write about but as usual, most of them will have to wait a bit, at least until after the multiple performances tonight (RCDT Social), tomorrow (Ms. Vietnam Pageant), and whatever associated gatherings are taking place after.

soo tired right now…sigghh just woke up from a really quick ‘nap’–i know this b/c my arms are numb and there’s a pool of saliva on the table haha, but i’m glad i actually woke…this could’ve been bad/worse haha. time to rush, class in less than an hour and a research question still TBD –”

hmm…kinda like the way things might be headed? guess we’ll see =)

arghrawrgrrbleargh

recently, and upcoming:

-super long blended together past weekend, combo of china nite stuff, v1 for open house, random napping, studying super late and early hours, various bonding…both fun and tiring
-don’t remember the last time i slept in my bed. this off-hand comment invited a barrage of clever comments from the rcdt peanut gallery (while waiting to perform at china nite), whose nosier members seem to have heard something off some grapevine or other and want to know facts about something i’m not really sure of. maybe i shouldn’t talk at all when i’m sleep-deprived, at risk of being abnormally hyper (e.g. dunkin donuts sat night) or putting foot in mouth every other sentence.
-rcdt social this fri; need to prep this wed, finish script stuff by tmrw…ohh boy
-some kind of research paper presentation thing this fri…haven’t come up with topic yet –” …fml
-badminton tournament this sat that i can’t attend again. yayy life of dancing.
-big vsa event/v1 performance this sat–>reason for the above point
-tryouts w/v1 for “huepa”, some kind of dance competition, this weds night. if we get in, add in another performance 4/28 or something
-mandatory aalc meeting tonight. still need to figure out if i should do this.
-meeting for house next year tonight. yeahhh i don’t know what i’m doing.
-need to finish late cs110 hw asap…tonight preferably
-arrange group meeting for pol psych class, prob sunday afternoon
-figure out if i’m in trouble w/roar…or do i mean figure out how much trouble i’m in
-make it to my other classes this week. stop missing classes >:/
-study with study friends to GET WORK DONE grrr
-spend a bit of time to jot down activities of past week(s): i think looking back it’ll be really interesting…studying/napping at starbucks, dunkin’ donuts, serc, arc, fruity yogurt, off-campus apt, and/or richardson til early hours of the morning; epic, intertwining stories from 4+ perspectives; fun and funny ways to bond.
-organize, edit and upload pics/vids from recent weeks. this might take a while…meaning it’ll prob happen the next time i’m trying to “study” without productive friends around. so hopefully not for a while.
-figure outtt myyy…future? yeahhh. this one’s familiar.
-remember other stuff that i need to do, b/c suuurely this can’t be all –”
-mentally reorganize :/

busyness is good i guess but this is arghhhaw3rjailsj;s. feel a bit like i might be in over my head. maybe just that same too many obligations thing. bleh.

i just checked webreg and it looks like i’m not actually registered for a polisci seminar despite it showing up…how does that happen? …summer class now? don’t like having to deal w/these things.

not supposed to overthink attraction, i believe. sooo that still leaves me unsure. friend? friend…need there be more? does either want more? howw do i go aboutt…what do i dooo hahaha. some things need more than just thought to figure out, for better i guess. the current me prefers taking action in order to figure something out, eg. asking questions, but it feels like there’s a bit more at stake here than just sounding stupid/weird-ish on account of asking waiters to find out where a hamburger chain started.

maybe not such a quick update after all…unsurprisingly.

argrawrdgrrrbleearghh sighh. pardon the sound effects.