I think I see the signs of what might be a precipitous downhill drop. It’s almost 2pm and I just woke up. I decided to try to take a half hour nap at around 6am and, checking my cellphone, ipod and computer alarms now, I might’ve woken up just to turn them all off.
missed Friday class again; just remembered today was extra important in terms of participation points. late to work at library but i’m not going anyway because i have to, well, work on that essay and also do computer science hw at the lab, which is now late b/c it’s past 11am. wow. why are Fridays, of all my days, the most annoying? …maybe has to do with being after Thurs nights and their related dance practice outings.
other classes are ok though with maybe the exception of world politics, that one with just two exams. things have been ok for the last few weeks, months…i really need to stay focused and finish the semester on a strong note.
i don’t like these realizations of things possibly aiming downhill. it’s all really up to me and how i guide my mind but…it’s not easy enough for me to do that. <–that being an excuse that i can’t slip past myself.
my occasionally overactive imagination combined with lapses in reason (which prob happen more often than i’d think) are really counterproductive right now.
just….i need to take a slight step back, so that i have enough room to see what’s going on.
would anything be said if i don’t speak?