I’ve recently been learning from a friends that the manner in which I ask questions has made people uncomfortable. It seems that I’ve not been mindful of the way in which I express those questions, because several close friends have admitted that they’ve felt almost like they’re “being interrogated” when I inquire about a line of thought. Hearing this, it’s occurred to me that this may be one of the factors contributing to why some people get a sense of seriousness from me haha. I’m also somewhat concerned because I wonder how many friends of mine don’t really feel at ease with me around because they don’t want to deal with my line of scrutiny.

The way I’m aiming to address this is by becoming more aware of the manner in which I ask questions. I actually don’t doubt that I’ve seemed laser-focused at times and that this scrutiny and resulting discomfort happens despite my lack of ill intent. Experiment time: if I adjust the manner in which I satisfy my curiosity in a way that does not cause others to feel the “interrogation effect”, will this have any positive or negative effect on how comfortable others feel around me?

It’s also interesting to observe how people interpret my curiosity, whether by dismissing the questions, getting uncomfortable, or lighting up and engaging with me. I interpret this as a natural example of how we see things as we are.


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